“Are you really sure about this? Do you think that you’re up to the challenge, the sacrifice, the possibility of failure? Do you know what you’re getting yourself into?” How many times have you heard someone ask you these questions? What were the circumstances and how did things turn out?
If we’ve never been asked these questions by others, or heard these questions coming from within ourselves, we might ask ourselves another question. Have I dared enough to undertake any great mission, role, or task? Have I risked heartbreak and loss enough to truly love others? Have I surrendered enough of myself that I have been able to commit to someone or something beyond myself?
I’m guessing that most of us know what it’s like to weigh the future in the balance and count the cost. We are people generally unafraid of commitment or responsibility, who are accustomed to leaving our comfort zones. Just this summer, here on the Discerning Leadership Team, Pablo became a father for the first time, and with his wife, Miren, began this great human adventure of parenting their little Gabriela. And Sofia, restless to challenge herself and encounter a new part of the world and its people, volunteered in humanitarian aid organizations in Ethiopia. Both of them inspire me with their willingness to “weigh the future and count the cost.” They each considered their choices carefully, and said “yes” without the luxury of having certainty of all the details. I also witnessed several younger Jesuits saying “yes,” to first vows as consecrated religious, and another his final vows of full incorporation into the Society of Jesus. Of course, none of them can anticipate exactly what the future holds for them, the challenges that will inevitably arise, or how their commitments will be tested. But the “yes” they offered was not based on calculations of certainties. In fact, it was a “yes” in the face of the uncertainty, to forward along a particular path, and to actively accept, even embrace what comes with hope and courage.
This is the kind of “yes” that Jesus is looking for in the Gospel as he turns to his followers, and asks whether they have weighed the future of their discipleship, and counted the cost. He does not want blind or deluded followers looking for ease, comfort, prestige or recognition. He does not expect them to know exactly the hour of their trial or testing, but he wants women and men whose “yes” will prevail beyond those moments, and lead to a long (always imperfect) faithfulness to his way, his path to the Kingdom. Far from promises of prosperity, even security, he searches for big hearted disciples willing to surrender everything that does not bring them closer to him in the service of this mission. He is looking for big hearted people who weigh the future and count the cost with hope and courage.
As leaders, what fruit might we draw from this Gospel? For me, the first lesson is that anyone looking for selfish gain from the service and responsibility of leadership is looking in the wrong place. Yes, the labor of leading with and for others can be one of the most growth-filled and satisfying things that we will ever do, but these fruits are most abundant for those whose hearts and intentions are in the right place. Second, when Jesus asks us to count the cost, he does not ask us to do so as an accountant might. An accountant must be cautiously responsible for each ledger of the balance sheet, past, present, and future. Rather, Jesus asks us to weigh the risks with big hearts, to say “yes” knowing that we will have to rely on his grace to carry us, and to meet the limits and challenges we face with magnanimity, or “great spirit.”
When we look around ourselves at a beautiful world in terrible pain and disrepair, in need of prophets, teachers, healers, and yes, real leadership with and for others, it is not heroes that we look for, but ordinary people who carry this great “yes” in their own hearts, and who foster this “yes” in others as well.
As you weigh the future and count the cost, do you feel the “yes” within yourself? Who encourages you from behind or walks by your side (we cannot do this alone)? What grace might you pray for to support your daily rededication to whatever and whomever you have given your heart?
With you on the road,
